Why can't women be reasonable?

<p>Recently I tried to surprise my wife by remembering her birthday and giving her something practical she needed. &#160;She's been ragging on me for a personal trainer so I know she sees how much muscle tone she's lost, so&#160;I got her a good used push mower for her birthday, and even hosed it off before giving it to her so it would look better. &#160;Instead of appreciating the fact that I finally had listened to what she been saying she got upset, saying something like "it's not what she wanted" hell what the heck does she want.</p> <p>&#160;</p> <p>We have big front and back yards, I figured she could work off all her fat and even she has to admit that's what she hoped a personal trainer would help her do. &#160;I've already told her how fat she's getting and gently reminded her that she'd not going to get back in shape if all she does is go to work, take care of the kids, run them back and forth to their schools and do shopping in a car, because the car does all the work.</p> <p>&#160;</p> <p>All that did was make her angry and she knows I don't like that, its not feminine to fuss like that over nothing. &#160;I finally had to tell her to shut up and make me some dinner, and remind her that she still hadn't finished the laundry. &#160;And she wonders why I drink. &#160;I don't want to have to learn her again, she better not overcook my steak. &#160;I swear if women didn't put out there would be a bounty on them. &#160;When she comes back out with my dinner she better be wearing something sexy and in a much better mood.</p>

Comments

Autumn Cote Added Apr 23, 2017 - 8:04pm
Please note, the best way to draw more attention to your work is to comment on the work of others.  I know this to be true because of you do I'll do everything in my power to draw more attention to your work. 
 
PS - There is a lot I can do and would like to do.  
Leroy Added Apr 23, 2017 - 9:07pm
Very funny, Rusty.  I give it a like knowing that you are not being serious.
Jeff Jackson Added Apr 23, 2017 - 9:08pm
Rusty, you might be coming off as too sensitive. I am told women like strong, masculine men. Of course, they seem to be attracted to gay men as well, but that might be just wanting something that they can't have. Everyone wants whatever it is that they can't have. Be careful what you pray for, God might give it to you.
Jeffry Gilbert Added Apr 23, 2017 - 9:35pm
Put another log on the fire
Cook me up some bacon and some beans
Go out to the car and lift it up and change the tire
Wash my socks a sew my old blue jeans
Come on baby
Fill my pipe and boil me up a pot of tea
Come on baby
Put another log on the fire 
And come and tell me why you're leaving me 
Rusty Smith Added Apr 24, 2017 - 10:00pm
Jeffry Gilbert I must admit that song was part of my inspiration.
Rusty Smith Added Apr 24, 2017 - 10:03pm
Jeff Jackson not much chance, my wife is accustomed to this kind of talk and would only laugh.  I am surprised no women's libbers have attacked me for saying such outrageous things.  I was looking forward to getting even more ridiculous in reply.  
 
Of course did didn't get her a used push mower, I got her a new one, what kind of guy do you think I am.
Rusty Smith Added Apr 24, 2017 - 10:04pm
Leroy gotta have a little fun every now and then.
Stone-Eater Friedli Added Jun 14, 2017 - 8:25am
Jeffry
 
Good to see you back :-)
Tamara Wilhite Added Jun 15, 2017 - 10:56pm
When I look at this, I see " &#160;" in front of what I think should be the start of each bullet/line.
Tubularsock Added Jun 16, 2017 - 12:11pm
Rusty, you really are a very patient fellow. Tubularsock "feels" your pain. And Tubularsock figures your wife even wants to get her hair and nails done so she can sit!
Wish you luck, Rusty.
A more reasonable man may have lost his temper but you are remarkable.
Tubularsock assumes this is your fifth wife?
Dino Manalis Added Jun 16, 2017 - 12:44pm
Sometimes, they're reasonable, but not always, they're always demanding and never satisfied.  You have to be understanding and try to find common ground.  Good luck!
Jeff Michka Added Jun 16, 2017 - 12:57pm
Dino "the Man" Manalis sez: Sometimes, they're reasonable, but not always, they're always demanding and never satisfied. - When you grow up, you might meet a woman or two.  I'm sure women will be drawn to your deep platitudes.  This was ol' Rusty's attempt at humor.  Although in comments, he lamented the lack of "women libbers" attacking him.
wsucram15 Added Jun 16, 2017 - 1:01pm
Sorry I had to actually read that to understand you were kidding, I got to the part about the car doing all the work before I realized you were either insane or kidding.
Women are usually reasonable, you just need to understand the logic of the one that "belongs" to you....we are not all the same.
Stone-Eater Friedli Added Jun 16, 2017 - 2:16pm
LOL
 
Whatever you say, it's wrong anyway. When you say, yep, you're too fat, she tells you, you don't love me anymore, when you say, no dear, you're not too fat she tells you that you're lying.
 
Buy her a pair of shoes. That will shut her up LOL
 
...but it won't change her shape ;-)
Stone-Eater Friedli Added Jun 16, 2017 - 2:18pm
...works with my wife, anyway ;-)
wsucram15 Added Jun 16, 2017 - 2:26pm
shoes usually do work..seriously..or a gift certificate for the fav shoe store..  A certificate to the gym might get you in serious trouble for a LONG time.
A  weekend getaway..is the ticket for any guy. Every time.  Even if its 4 hours from the house.  Even just an overnight in a B&B, leave early though the night before (time to unwind).
 
It benefits you as well. think about it.
 
Stone-Eater Friedli Added Jun 16, 2017 - 2:53pm
Jeanne
 
LOL
 
The problem is that women are better talkers than men are listeners ;-)
Stone-Eater Friedli Added Jun 16, 2017 - 2:54pm
BTW:
 
Thanks for the getaway idea. But then...one has to have the cash for that, right ? ;-)
wsucram15 Added Jun 16, 2017 - 6:20pm
SEF..Not really, its amazing how a picnic and a day "away from it all" can help.  Does not take money, it takes creativity.  You have to think of simple things to make her feel special.  Thats all.
My favorite place to go is a museum.  Most around me are free, it would just be the gas to go and perhaps parking.  Lets say at the most 30.00. Thats at the most.
If my BF packed a lunch, took me to DC and we went to ANY of the tons of museums there (they are free), I would be thrilled. We could picnic outside on the national mall then go home. Im not just talking art though, we have the Smithsonian which is huge.  We could also drive to any number of places to take pictures of things and picnic.  Im sure you have something there or very close you can take her to..
Simple things are the best...find someplace close and make a day of it. Its important.  One time when a friend of mine was taking me on an adventure..we found a train that does "dinner murder mysteries" it was cool.  That was a little more expensive but it was a neat day, I met a ton of people.
Getting back into photography was great, I joined a club and we went out at least once a week on assignments...sometimes we just met at places to take pics.  It was cool and lots of fun.
 
Find something you both like, and just go. Take the time for something special...its worth it. ;)
 
Stone-Eater Friedli Added Jun 16, 2017 - 6:29pm
You have to think of simple things to make her feel special.  Thats all.
 
I'm not very imaginative on that, unfortunately. My interests and women's interests have rarely been the same, probably I never met a woman which had the same interests than me except my dear first lady who traveled around the globe with me 1979-1982.
 
My wife from Africa and me live together for 22 years now, and we're happy. We don't have the same interests - NO WAY, but we still learn from each other, we have our freedoms, and, one doesn't need to discuss this and that all the time - for that I got other people.
 
What she brings into my life is much more important: A lively social life, full house and emotions.
Stone-Eater Friedli Added Jun 16, 2017 - 6:31pm
BTW: I don't need to show her that she's special to me. Not after 22 years LOL
Jeff Michka Added Jun 16, 2017 - 8:06pm
wsucram15 sez wisely: A  weekend getaway..is the ticket for any guy. Every time.  Even if its 4 hours from the house.  Even just an overnight in a B&B, leave early though the night before (time to unwind).-This does always work and is worth getting the cash to do. There are times you have to consider even small amounts "investment."  In this case, in your own relationship.  Of course, for it to work, the relationship should be good, or "servicable," or it would be away time "with a pain in the ass." :-)
Mircea Negres Added Jun 17, 2017 - 3:49am
Rusty, I realize this is satire, but in my experience women are often unreasonable because they overestimate the value of their cleavage and what lies beneath their G-strings. They're aided in thinking that by men, who are desperate to get in there. So, instead of telling them what they need to hear, men tell women what they want to hear. When that happens for a long enough time, delusion becomes the new reality. One day, I heard two women talking and figured out one wasn't getting any because her husband wasn't turned on by her ability to simultaneously fall off the bed on both sides. Well, she was 5' 5" and weighed around 200 lbs because she used food for comfort... Her man was around the same height, but only weighed around 140-150 lbs. Listening to what kind of cuckoo world she lived in, I said to myself "What do you think? That he's only going to be interested in your personality? Stop munching and hit the treadmill!" 
Rusty Smith Added Jun 20, 2017 - 8:50pm
MJ  Your link didn't work, it's been sold but I get the point.  I try to be a good husband, after all I did give her my name and I even take her younger sister out to the movies every now and then.  Last year I bought her a new vacuum, now that's love.
Rusty Smith Added Jun 20, 2017 - 8:56pm
Mircea Negres Its all about good planning.  First if you give them enough housework to do and don't waste money on things like dishwashers and power lawnmowers, it'll be hard for them to get fat in the first place.  Second, don't give them credit cards and keep their allowance small enough and they won't be able to snack.  The only ice cream and beer needs to be in your locked frig, not somewhere where they can suck it up whenever they feel neglected.  If that's not enough have them put a few coats of wax on their fishing boat.....   You did make sure you got a wife that came with a decent one, didn't you?  
 
Think before you answer, don't make me yank you man card!
Peter Corey Added Jun 22, 2017 - 6:39pm
Rex Harrison sings, "Why Can't a Woman Be More Like a Man?"
 
Lyrics:

"Why Can't a Women Be More Like a Man?"
from the musical, "My Fair Lady"
Music: Frederick Loewe
Lyrics: Alan Jay Lerner

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Why can't a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
Eternally noble, historically fair.
Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat.
Why can't a woman be like that?
Why does every one do what the others do?
Can't a woman learn to use her head?
Why do they do everything their mothers do?
Why don't they grow up, well, like their father instead?
 
Why can't a woman take after a man?
Men are so pleasant, so easy to please.
Whenever you're with them, you're always at ease.
 
Would you be slighted if I didn't speak for hours?
 
COLONEL PICKERING:
Of course not.
 
PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Would you be livid if I had a drink or two?
 
COLONEL PICKERING:
Nonsense.
 
PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Would you be wounded if I never sent you flowers?
 
COLONEL PICKERING:
Never.
 
PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Well, why can't a woman be like you?
 
One man in a million may shout a bit.
Now and then, there's one with slight defects.
One perhaps whose truthfulness you doubt a bit,
But by and large we are a marvelous sex!
 
Why can't a woman take after a man?
'Cause men are so friendly, good-natured and kind.
A better companion you never will find.
 
If I were hours late for dinner would you bellow?
 
COLONEL PICKERING:
Of course not.
 
PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
If I forgot your silly birthday, would you fuss?
 
COLONEL PICKERING:
Nonsense.
 
PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Would you complain if I took out another fellow?
 
COLONEL PICKERING:
Never.
 
PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Why can't a woman be like us?
 
[dialog]
 
PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Why can't a woman be more like a man?
Men are so decent, such regular chaps;
Ready to help you through any mishaps;
Ready to buck you up whenever you're glum.
Why can't a woman be a chum?
 
Why is thinking something women never do?
And why is logic never even tried?
Straightening up their hair is all they ever do.
Why don't they straighten up the mess that's inside?
 
Why can't a woman behave like a man?
If I was a woman who'd been to a ball,
Been hailed as a princess by one and by all;
Would I start weeping like a bathtub overflowing,
Or carry on as if my home were in a tree?
Would I run off and never tell me where I'm going?
Why can't a woman be like me?
 
Athena Carson Added Jun 29, 2017 - 9:17am
Haha - my husband made the mistake of trying to sign me up for a gym.  That wasn't the mistake, though!  I love working out and would have appreciated the gym membership.  The mistake was that he TOLD THE PERSON ON THE PHONE that he was signing me up as an anniversary gift.  They wouldn't let him do it.  We laughed about it later, and then I went and signed myself up.
Rusty Smith Added Jun 30, 2017 - 8:22pm
Athena Carson that sounds right to me, some women wouldn't be happy if their husbands bought them a new lawnmower!
Leroy Added Jun 30, 2017 - 10:27pm
I still don't see why I have to put the toilet lid down.  Entirely unreasonable and illogical.  If I leave it up, no one can pee on it, right?  If I leave it down, then she complains about the pee.  A guy just can't win.
Rusty Smith Added Jul 1, 2017 - 11:12am
Leroy It is a lot easier to put it down than to put it back up, but that's not the issue.
 
Women's brains are an inferior design and they lack the logic necessary to see the larger picture.  They don't realize that men leave it up so that they, (the women), don't have to wipe pee off the seat before they sit down to use it.  We men are actually being considerate when we leave it up.
 
If you leave it down and really mess it up with pee a few times, they will get the point.  It's all about proper training.
Leroy Added Jul 4, 2017 - 10:07am
Yeah, they throw logic out the door.  I am convinced that it is more about showing submission, much like forcing the man to carry her pocketbook.  Ok, that it more of a China thing, but it is coming your way.
Leroy Added Jul 4, 2017 - 10:08am
I didn't realize it, but there is actually an international symbol for marriage.
Rusty Smith Added Jul 4, 2017 - 2:27pm
Leroy  unfortunately for real misogynists like us, China has already started to outgrow your stereotype.  In modern China they not only get to wear shoes and get jobs of their own, their younger generation of women are increasingly outperforming the men in educational institutions and getting more of the management jobs than the men.
 
China is definitely the wrong place to go if you want a submissive woman.
 
You have to stay here where millions of them are taught in church that their place is behind the man, following his lead, not standing along side him debating about it.
Leroy Added Jul 6, 2017 - 7:32am
"China is definitely the wrong place to go if you want a submissive woman."
 
Never have truer words ever been spoken.  Chinese women are great, if you need another boss.
 
And, Romania.  Women rule there.  A company has more prestige if managed by a woman.  But, I am ok with that as long as they continue wearing sexy clothes to work.
Rusty Smith Added Jul 6, 2017 - 8:48pm

Leroy  I do think it's about time women go battle it out in the corporate world so that men can hang around the house, drink beer and get fat.  Why should men have all the fun.
Leroy Added Jul 6, 2017 - 8:58pm
I agree, Rusty.  And look what a fine job Carly Carleton Fiorina did with HP!  We're pretty useless anyway.  We can all be Mr. Mom.
Rusty Smith Added Jul 16, 2017 - 9:42pm
Leroy  there will always be exeptions, Joan of Arc was certainly another strong woman who did pretty well, but the vast majority are make better housewives.