Redefining Gay

Today more children than ever consider themselves Gay or even something like Transgender and with lots of them it's not because they are Gay or Transgender, it's because it's become PC to ask them the big question before they are old enough to understand what it means. 


Most have been told what Gay is but not been informed about what is normal for people who aren't Gay.  They understandably decide they must be Gay because they have feelings they have been told are "Gay" feelings, but unfortunately not been made aware how normal it is for people of either gender who are straight, to feel just like they do.


Where we once called a girl a tomboy for wanting to play with boys, get dirty and do all the boy stuff, we now tell them that might mean they are gay.  If a boy wants to wear pretty clothes and play with his sister's dolls, he's told that's a girl thing and he might be gay. 


Telling young children that if they are more comfortable with members of their own sex means they might be gay is absurd because most really wont know until they go though puberty.  Even participating in and enjoying sexual activities with members of the same sex is no real indicator, it's often no more than experimentation, that means far less when they are young than how they feel after puberty and a few relationships.  Lots of people in prison have opportunistic sex with members of the same sex and that hardly makes them gay.  Masturbation is proof positive that men and women enjoy getting off and all the hardware many spend money on proves they don't have to be in love to go to great lengths to get off.


Many Transgender people flip flop, sometimes more than a few times, as adults, so how can we ever expect confused kids to make decisions about emotional issues they aren't mature enough to analyze fully.


I think we were all better off when kids grew up and decided these things for themselves.  We should stay out of their lives and let them grow up naturally.


EXPAT Added Aug 27, 2017 - 10:54pm
Spot on Riley.
I can attest to what you say, from the time I owned a 150 student day care center. We kept a selection of adult clothes of both  genders for the kids to play dress up. They seemed to randomly try being mommy or daddy. But there was no sexual connotation. It was role playing!
To my layman's understanding, children don't begin to associate with a sexual role until Puberty, which is usually early teens.
It was also my observation that Girls in their early years were more aggressive, rougher and stronger than boys of the same age.
Unfortunately there are many in the teaching profession, that feel they have to TRAIN young minds, rather than DEVELOPE their instincts.
Just my personal view, boys are no longer required to perform hard tasks, such as feeding the livestock, go hunting with papa, or kill the chickens for dinner. Hell, asking a child to work nowadays is considered abuse.
Bill H. Added Aug 28, 2017 - 12:21am
Many do not realize that homosexuality has been part of nature for eons. It is very common in social animals and is actual nature's way of controlling populations to prevent depletion of food sources and retain other balances.
I once worked with a marine biologist who studied homosexuality within various fish species and just recently attended a symposium discussing his findings and comparing them with others who performed the same research on other groups of animals including primates.
There are probably many who would never agree to this fact, but research is proving otherwise. Everyone is born with a set level of sexual desire and a set preference of partners in their genes that usually begins to surface around the age of 12. Nothing can change this, and there are no "cures" to alter one's sexual preferences. There has been use of various drugs to try and "de-gay" people, such as apomorphine and various androgen/estrogen treatments, of course with no success.
I once read that the British Army added potassium bromide to their soldiers’ tea to overcome their frustrated sexual urges.
When will we accept the fact that homosexuality is normal and is probably on the increase due to increases in population.
Live with it, people.
Saint George Added Aug 28, 2017 - 4:09am
Live and let live.
How dangerously libertarian and individualistic of you, john-g.
You're still pathetic, though.
Minister Peaceful Poet Added Aug 28, 2017 - 5:41am
I agree its PC
Because its rad to be be gay, transgender, especially if you're white and especially if you're a white man.
But I think their might be more to it.  The male hormone is under attack.  You might find this interesting:
Bill Kamps Added Aug 28, 2017 - 6:12am
Riley, exactly right.  Telling young kids they are gay makes no sense on many levels.  We really dont need a bunch of 7 year olds running around school proclaiming they are gay, because Mommy said so.  That surely can cause a lot of unnecessary harm.  People who are gay, figure it out for themselves eventually, its not something others can tell them.
Its also not like being gifted in music, that parents need to brag about it.
George N Romey Added Aug 28, 2017 - 10:29am
Kids at age 7 should be allowed to be kids.  Forcing a 7 year old to come to grips with their sexuality is a recipe for a very unadjusted adult.
Dino Manalis Added Aug 28, 2017 - 2:57pm
Gay is abnormal and transgender is limited to those with hormonal imbalances!
Bill H. Added Aug 28, 2017 - 3:24pm
Dino - are you saying gay is abnormal because the majority of people are not gay, or are you saying this because your religion or your own fabricated opinion told you it is abnormal.
Just curious.
Riley Brown Added Aug 28, 2017 - 9:48pm
Expat I have no problems with people who are gay, it's there life and no amount of confusing or coaching them when they are young is going to change their eventual orientation.
However I do think it's wrong and even hurtful and harmful to their mental development and often to their eventual happiness as a young adult, for grown adults to lead them down a false path when their too young to competently deal with those issues and feelings.
Riley Brown Added Aug 28, 2017 - 9:56pm
Bill H I wouldn't use fish as an example, many change sexes as they mature, and what they do has nothing to do with how people mature. 
Children might be born with a predisposition but the vast majority will not understand their own dealings and what they mean until they fully mature and make it though puberty.  I know lots of gay people who say they knew at a very young age, most close to 14, but have no idea how many thought they had those feelings and then found out how it felt to be in a heterosexual relationship and never looked back.
I say leave them alone, their going to figure it out themselves and it doesn't help to teach them they have "choices" when they are young.
They don't have choices and what they do and how they feel as kids really doesn't matter, when they mature they will know.
Riley Brown Added Aug 28, 2017 - 9:58pm
George Romney, in my opinion, teaching a child about their sexuality choices at age 7 should qualify for child abuse. 
Bill H. Added Aug 28, 2017 - 10:01pm
Exactly what I am saying
Jeff Jackson Added Aug 28, 2017 - 10:59pm
Good article Riley. The vast majority of young children do not understand sexuality, even less understand  homosexuality. There is no point in explaining it to them until they are at an age where they begin to ask questions about it. Sexuality to children under the age of 10 or so (yes, there are exceptions) is mostly just that there are boys and there are girls and that is about the extent of it. Insisting that they understand sexuality at an early age is not how to make children aware of sexuality, it will come in time. I believe that some of the "minority" sexual preference people would like to insist that children understand trans-sexuality and homosexuality at an early age, while I think that is imposing upon them and exploiting their innocence. Certainly, questions regarding sexuality must be dealt with, but not forced upon young children who should be learning reading writing and arithmetic. 
Shane Laing Added Aug 29, 2017 - 2:18am
Like this article Riley. I just can't understand why busy-bodies who really have nothing better to do, can't just let the kids be kids. Let them have fun and enjoy life when they are young and not try and box them in.
Glenn Verasco Added Aug 29, 2017 - 5:58am
Excellent, Riley.
There is so much to learn in this world. It's criminal that kids these days are made to think about gender identity and sexuality and what have you. These are adult matters, and kids are not even sexual mature at a biological level, as you said.
Make America Sane Again!
Bill H. Added Aug 29, 2017 - 4:47pm
Read the second response.
Riley Brown Added Aug 29, 2017 - 10:15pm
Michael, Bill is right I did provide my "OPINION", for what it's worth above, but will repeat so you don't have to find it.
I think:
Children might be born with a predisposition but the vast majority will not understand their own dealings and what they mean until they fully mature and make it though puberty.  I know lots of gay people who say they knew at a very young age, most close to 14, but have no idea how many thought they had those feelings and then found out how it felt to be in a heterosexual relationship and never looked back.
I say leave them alone, their going to figure it out themselves and it doesn't help to teach them they have "choices" when they are young.
They don't have choices and what they do and how they feel as kids really doesn't matter, when they mature they will know.
IN ADDITION I think a lot of the people pushing this stuff would disagree with me and think it's cool to make a large chunk of our younger generation grow up thinking they might be Gay because it makes them more accepting and tolerant of the people who are.
That may be true, but I'd argue they play some pretty serious head games with our most vulnerable kids, and I don't find anything amusing about that, I think it should be a crime to do so.  In my mind its not up there with Pedophilia but related in the same way Manslaughter is related to Murder. 
By now we know that most of the children who begin to think they are Gay and agonize over it, won't turn out to be.  Teaching them things that lead them in that direction is  should be criminal, we know better by now.
And for the people who really do like the recent availability of young kids who are searching for answers about their own sexuality and use this as an excuse, I think they belong in prison.
Bill Kamps Added Aug 30, 2017 - 1:44pm
Riley, I agree.  Puberty is confusing enough, even for straight kids, we dont need adults giving kids more reasons to be confused, or even frightened. 
As you say, they dont have a choice, so they will know at some point, and before that time, it is wrong to make them think they have a choice, and also wrong to give them the impression they may be part of a very small minority.  I cant imagine adults can predict who will turn out to be gay, by looking at kids behavior.
Henry Ortiz Added Aug 30, 2017 - 8:14pm
Good article, it interesting that people out of ignorance don't want to just say to their kids that they are females if they have a vagina and males if they have a penis.
It has been proven that homosexuality is normal, in fact there is a study about epigenetics that has lead to more doubts about a relation between genetics and homosexuality. They, scientific think is more an external influence. 
The he fact that we have seen homosexuality since we know about history does not mean normality, rapers have been with us forever, does that mean that being a rapist is normal, of course not.
We need more studies about the "mystery" of our minds to understand those "tendencies".
Riley Brown Added Aug 30, 2017 - 9:56pm
Henry Ortiz, be very careful with that very loaded word, "Normal", it means very different things to different people and highly offends lots them when you involve sexual orientation topics.
I've always defined "normal" as within  the "norm" and the PC crowd has been redefining normal to mean "OK", which I think is plain ol stupid.  OK is a completely different word with a completely different connotation.
Six foot tall women are not normal, and neither are genius's like Albert Einstein but the modern PC crowd has mis-associated the word normal with "GOOD", and think by forcing everyone else to accept their delusional redefinition, they can stop all the phobias they associate with the words "not normal".  By teaching out children all the sexual choices they are now free to make are "NORMAL".
There is no relationship between normal and good or OK.
Benjamin Goldstein Added Aug 31, 2017 - 2:50pm
I certainly wouldn't go so far as to say informing a 7-year-old on homosexuality is child abuse. The problem is really about can we advise when it comes to partner choices. Can we voice a preference for the opposite sex as an option for our children?
People should know their choices and I see no problem in telling small kids superficially about the fertility of straight couples and the infertility of gay couples, the options of adoption, child care and what you can think of.
But there is an age when people may choose a partner and for the bisexuals who really have an option they may make an informed choice on their emotions and their plans for life.
Things are different with hormone blockers for transexuals. I have no easy answer for that.
What worries me is that more and more people identify as 'queer'. As humans we all are equal but the condition of homosexuality, the outlook of having much fewer options for a partnership that will last, is not just as great. Gender transitioning with all the medicine, the lower life expectancy, the suicide rate etc is not as good as feeling at home with your body.
People are equal, their challenges in life, however, can be better or worse.
Jeff Michka Added Aug 31, 2017 - 9:45pm
Bill H asks Dino - are you saying gay is abnormal because the majority of people are not gay,-That's just what he said.  Good article, Riley. Benjamin G sez: People should know their choices and I see no problem in telling small kids-If I child asks, then it's a signal "time to talk".  They may have "heard" on noticed, and rather it be me that talks to them about it than someone with a moral bent or outcome desired.  Now, that is child abuse.
Bill H. Added Aug 31, 2017 - 9:50pm
Riley, you are correct about fish that actually change sex. Most or all of those are reef dwelling varieties. One could imagine that homosexuality and even sex change would be very important in something as limited as a reef habitat due to rapidly changing conditions and food supplies.
Nature has some pretty good methods to sustain species populations.
Stone-Eater Added Sep 2, 2017 - 5:26am
Gender and sex are private and none of other people's business. Period. What's the fuss ? Religion again.....
Bill H. Added Sep 2, 2017 - 11:03am
SEF - Many times when people don't understand something, they immediately condemn it. This has probably been true with homosexuality for eons. They also have their weapon of interpreting Bible passages to condemn gay people.
Riley Brown Added Sep 2, 2017 - 11:50am
Benjamin Goldstein, I'd like to leave the task of helping young kids overcome sexual problems, up to their parents, but that aside, can't really think of a good reason to get in to too much sexual detail with any 7 year old beyond what it takes to help them avoid child abuse.
7 year olds don't spend much time thinking about their own or other's sexual orientation unless we "educate" them about those things.  7 year old's who like to spend time with people of the same sex are normal and without coaching generally wouldn't think its not normal for other people even if their not Gay.  Boys who like boys and girls who like girls are quite normal in their world.  At that age they are quite accepting of almost anything because they don't "know better".
However going past that and telling them that they have choices and detailing them for them at that age is not appropriate.  At that age, they haven't matured enough to understand what is normal emotions for someone their age and most of the so called "choices" involve emotions and urges that they won't experience until they get much older and go though puberty.
When we explain the "signs" that someone is something other than heterosexual to a 7 year old all we're doing is inviting them to their own feelings and draw conclusions and do other things with that "information" that are completely inappropriate for a child.
Let them go outside and play, they deserve to have fun as a child without all those worries and concerns.
Bill H. Added Sep 2, 2017 - 3:05pm
When I was in elementary school, in about 3rd grade we had two boys who would hang out with the girls at recess, playing hopscotch, jump rope, and other girl games. They would never play games with the boys. Sadly, they were always called "sissies" by the boys and teased constantly. By the time we all entered High School, it became obvious that these two guys were homosexuals. I just wanted to point this out to those who keep insisting that being gay is a choice or "learned" behavior.
Riley Brown Added Sep 3, 2017 - 11:34am
Bill, unfortunately the world is very diverse and in every large sample there are tails on each end of the bell curve that contain examples of things that are not statistically normal.
I too remember a boy who was allowed to play with the girls in elementary school, but have no idea if he grew up to be gay.  In my school no one called him a sissy, he was just different in that way and at that age it meant nothing to me or my classmates because no one told us it had any special significance.
Today he'd be told he might be Gay, told all about all his sexual "choices", and the rest of us would be told he might be Gay so we could think about what that means.  I think today everyone spend much more time thinking about those issues than kids ever did when I grew up, and less time playing and having fun.
Stone-Eater Added Sep 3, 2017 - 1:16pm
Many times when people don't understand something, they immediately condemn it
Yep. Instead of simply shutting up until they know what they talk about.
Benjamin Goldstein Added Sep 3, 2017 - 3:00pm
Riley Brown, I'm not sure where your point contradicts mine. We go into the same detail talking about homosexuality like when we talk about heterosexuality.
I never said that anybody but the parents should be given the task of talking about whatever to children. But I won't bite my tongue and I don't see how a child would care. Because we have so few kids these days we have become a bit too overprotective.
Riley Brown Added Sep 3, 2017 - 11:26pm
Benjamin, today we have over 10% of our youth self identifying and out of the closet, themselves as not heterosexual in some school districts.  that is far far more than I believe will think so once they go though puberty and find out how they really feel.
"LAUSD has more than 655,000 students enrolled in grades K-12, and its research indicates nearly 11 percent may identify as LGBT."
That only happens because we indoctrinate them at a early age and obviously mix a lot of them up.
Stone-Eater Added Sep 4, 2017 - 7:28am
Riley Brown Added Sep 4, 2017 - 12:11pm
Stone-Eater, interesting article, and I don't doubt the part of the medical profession, therapists to surgeons, is doing all they can to encourage this relatively new transsexual trend because they make money from it, but that's not all there is too it.
There may not have been a way for people who had those urges to do anything about it not so long ago, but they were still there.  Back then all they could do is dress the part and pretend.
What I think is wrong is our rush to expose young children to their "choices" in ways that encourages them to misdiagnose their own feelings because their too young to understand the whole picture.
I am even convinced that many of the most involved members of the LGBTQ are participating for all the wrong reasons.  The official reason the program exists is to prevent discrimination, but I see too many who take it full step further.  It's just too easy for a teacher who is allowed to discuss intimate sexual urges with high school students who will be legal to have sex with in a year or two, to groom one or two for personal use at the same time.
Ever notice how many male teachers are married to former students?  I have, and it's shocking, especially when you realize they met in a classroom where fraternization was forbidden.
Well I've noticed how many relationships some Gay teachers have with former students and no one will convince me they aren't thinking about that as they coach the more attractive  students on maters of their own sexuality.  Would it be any surprise if we found out those school programs are very attractive to Gay people who like young partners?
Generally teachers are forbidden from fraternizing with students outside of class, but in many school districts that rule has an exemption for teachers who are helping sexually distressed children, especially if they say it's on matters the children are afraid to talk to their parents about.  Oh then they can meet with them after school, drive them places, talk and text with them for hours, take the out to eat, talk about their sexual feelings, and it's all with the blessing of the school district.
Is it any surprise some of those kids end up in their beds!
Benjamin Goldstein Added Sep 4, 2017 - 2:21pm
Riley Brown, as I have written, I'm also concerned about the explosion of LGBT identifiers. I believe it has something to do with maligning gender-conform people. It is like Islam-converts. Many of them are not really attracted to Islam but seek spirituality when other options are derided. Obviously some are genuinely interested in Islam.
Recently, I heard Ann Coulter talk about the 'real gays' as opposed to those 'who just want to piss off daddy', but of course she is joking and does not really know what is going on. Blaire White has a very successful YouTube channel expanding on it, but not too much because she is still very young. She just noticed that trannies are some kind of fashion trend at the moment and some are not real. 
I think Stone-Eater Friedli is right that the gay cult has both a religious and a commercial dimension. If I was more involved in the issue I would perhaps try to find out more about it.
You have mentioned the bell curve. I hope you don't mind that I go off the main topic for a sec. I'm new here. I have the funny feeling that most here are rather at the upper end of the IQ spectrum. I thought about John G (who I wildly disagree with) and I checked what he wrote. He is trying to talk about macroeconomics. Some are talking about maths, others about currency. Dave Volek has basically "invented" socialism. I may sound a bit like Hercule Poireau, but could it be that we all a bit off? What, for example, if Dave Volek wakes up to the notion that he has invented something many people try to propagandize him into?
Is it why we are here? Could it be that we are onto something but are still a bit off? How did she find us? Either our posts convert truth and the stimulated discussions are to bring us nearer to it or Autumn selected types like us because she sees already something and has a plan. I have read a 'Beat Goes On' thread by Autumn and she says that she finds our posts hilarious as a collection. That may be a compliment or she does hint that all of us are a bit off.
Riley Brown Added Sep 17, 2017 - 11:19pm
 Benjamin, I can't speak for others but I regularly see forum participants who have a huge range of reasons for participating, from wanting to argue to trying to entertain themselves.
I like the interaction, especially with those who disagree with me.  There is no better safe place to try and discuss hot button topics with advocates who disagree with me, than a forum and I do want to learn about and become very well versed on their opinion and motivations. 
I don't believe I can alter most people's opinions on their hot button topics, but I can learn from them, and sometimes they do tell me things I previously didn't know or consider.  At the same time I believe if I am somewhat civil and offer a strong rational argument, I might influence some of them to reconsider their stands on some topics.  At least I can show some of them their opposition are not all stupid or just ignorant people who can't understand logical arguments.
Benjamin Goldstein Added Sep 19, 2017 - 4:30pm
Riley: Yes, you are right. We don't change people's minds (BTW forget my IQ theory). I think it is difficult today to find this wide range of participants. Most people choose a forum according to their opinions. This is the thing that makes WB different. It is still how forums used to be in the past. It has a variety of people (though they are too few). I also like the debate part.
It is not why I do it. Now, that I have looked around I think that I'm the only one who is really, really off, but I can't help myself. I'm not 'off' because of the content of what I say, but because I know I won't pierce through and yet can't give up. The definition of madness.
I came here to inform. I'm like a missionary (only that my issue is not religious). My articles don't really spark debates because they are not opinion pieces. People can only opine when they have digested enough information. I won't convince anybody anytime soon. So I'm off because I know that I can't convince.
If it was just for the reasonable argument, persuation would be an easy feat. I often win debates with people on the left, but that does not result in a change of mind. The other person disappears, throws insults or -and I'm not kidding- deletes his entire comment history on the thread (on disqus).
Try to find a criticism of Maggie Thatcher that is not vile. Reason is not the mode in which people operate. Thatcher was a big debater. People despise her for it.
You did an amazing job in this thread. If somebody is level-headed here, it's probably you.
Dr. Rupert Green Added Sep 23, 2017 - 7:45am
Wow! In the 90 when I taught HS is different from the 20s. There seems to be a proliferation of female gays. This also profound in middle schools. Schools are to teach values. But what is the current American value?
Riley Brown Added Sep 24, 2017 - 9:22am
Dr Green there are two differences, one is that being gay was no something people generally publicized years ago so you didn't know they were there, but they always were. 
I tend to think of those days as the good old days because in a way gays were more equal than they are today in most parts of the country, no one except their close friends knew they were gay and they were judged completely by their own actions and accomplishments.  No where is this more obvious than in the military where we found out some of our best military were gay after don't ask don't tell ended.
The second difference, public schools became "gay friendly" employees years ago and that made them very attractive to the LGBTQ community.  Not only do they offer safe employment in a gay friendly environment, they offer benefits to partners, and a working environment where most of the people they come into contact with don't dare cross them, (students).  You see the result, in some schools almost half the staff are LGBTQ.  They also offer very good pay for a 9 month a year job, and health and pension benefits that are unequaled in any private sector job I know of.