In Honor of Fire and Fury

I wish I had begun my blog in 2016 instead of 2017. That way, I would have been able to claim ownership of this parody of The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down, by the Band, in real time.  I wrote it in July of 2016. But since the topic of the parody just won’t get out of the news, I am posting it now, in honor of the new book by Michael Wolff. I won’t claim complete prescience, but …..

 

Donald Trump is the name, and I ran to be President,

Till reality set in, and I learned what that job meant,

I was tweeting up a storm, scoring bigly, worried not ’bout form

Told that I was going to fall, it’s a thing I remember not at all

 

The night they drove the Donald mad, and all the bells were ringing

The night they drove the Donald mad, and all the people were singing, they went

What were we thinking of, he’s loony, and incompetent

 

Back with my wife in Trump tower, and I showed her my huge hands

She say “Donald, run for office, there’s no one can beat your stands”

Now I possess the candidacy, and I don’t care if Ryan falls from a tree,

You don’t diss the Don, you pay homage instead,

But I can’t stand that they call me sick in the head

 

The night they drove the Donald mad, and all the bells were ringing

The night they drove the Donald mad, and all the people were singing, they went

What were we thinking of, he’s loony, and incompetent

 

Call me ignorant of founding texts, I will trash your wife,

Call me poor as a businessman, I will ruin your life,

I’m no loser, I’m hugely big, and Pocahontas, I see you are a pig

Can’t wait till I’ve got the button to press,

You will see those losers in distress

 

The night they drove the Donald mad, and all the bells were ringing

The night they drove the Donald mad, and all the people were singing, they went

What were we thinking of, he’s loony, and incompetent

 

Originally written in July 2016 after the Republican convention. Posted in January 2018 on my blog at https://evenabrokenclock.blog

Comments

Leroy Added Jan 5, 2018 - 4:22pm
It seems the progressive loonies are the ones being driven mad...lol.
Jeffrey Kelly Added Jan 5, 2018 - 6:34pm
We’re just following the Trumplings and Trump himself’s lead, Leroy.
Phil Greenough Added Jan 5, 2018 - 7:41pm
I can’t think of anything more insane than releasing five hardened terrorists for a deserter. Not just any deserter, a deserter that caused many to lose their lives in search of him.  Not just any deserter, a deserter whose father is a member of the Taliban.  Don’t mistake me, the Don has some serious flaws, vanity being his biggest weakness by far.  But he wouldn’t do something as crazy at what Obama did to get Bergdahl back.  He also wouldn’t do anything as crazy as hand Russia a reset button after it had just invaded a sovereign nation.   
Tubularsock Added Jan 6, 2018 - 1:15am
Phil, get real! These fuckers would sell their degenerate mothers for their fucked up egos!
 
Obummer, Orangefuck and the rest of them.
 
You are living in a dream world. The U.S. under the watchful eye of Shrub, Obummer, and now Orangefuck have trained and supplied ISIS all these years and you are worried about some innocuous release of a guy who was not only THERE but woke up to the total bullshit of this country!
 
If the citizens of this country, including you Phil would wake the fuck up ....... lives would be saved!
 
And for Christ sake, Phil get your facts straight about Russia! Fucking look into who did what where ........... Russia is the least of our problems!
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 6, 2018 - 12:46pm
Leroy, I wrote this back in 2016 when Donald Trump's faults were obvious to me, but apparently not to enough voters to prevent his election. I've been anti-Trump ever since he took down the USFL back in the early '80's through his bull-headed insistence on taking on the NFL in head-to-head competition and in suing the NFL, only to win the battle and lose the war (and the league). Even though I've never lived in NY, nor watched any of the iterations of The Apprentice, Donald Trump's insecurities and excessive vanities have always caused me to despise him. I come by my dislike honestly.
 
Now, I will say that back in the 70's and 80's, the man could speak well and thoughtfully, and even with eloquence. Compare and contrast that with the mental miasma that passes for an unscripted public statement, or the transcription of an interview where you wonder just what the hell he is talking about.
 
The man has serious, serious problems, and the sooner that is admitted by those who are sucking up to him in order to maintain their hold on power, the better off we and the world will be.
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 6, 2018 - 12:49pm
Phil, even if you consider the Bergdahl trade as the worst individual decision that Obama made, do you truly draw a moral equivalence between that decision and the potential that Trump's instability could draw us into a conflict in the Korea's with potentially millions of casualties?  That is the logical endpoint for this battle of ego's in the tweetersphere.
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 6, 2018 - 12:54pm
Thanks, Tube. I notice one feature for those who support Donald Trump. They have a very poor memory for historical facts and sequences of events. The attempt by Hilary to improve relations which included a humorous gift of a reset button preceded the invasion of Ukraine by Russia by several years. Not that this matters so some folks who are a bit fluid on their historical sequences.
George N Romey Added Jan 6, 2018 - 1:20pm
I agree Trump was much more articulate in the 80s and 90s.  Not the kind of guy that would claim Obama born somewhere else, says he has proof but somehow never gets around to providing the proof.
 
So far his administration has been erratic with more coming and goings (and friends turned to enemies) than a big city whorehouse. 
Thomas Napers Added Jan 7, 2018 - 4:23am
The logical endpoint of doing nothing about North Korea’s or Iran’s nuclear program is nuclear holocaust.  By way of example, look no further than Jonestown or any suicide jihadist.  Some people are crazy and Trump does us all a great service by letting the crazies know we’re prepared to end their nuclear ambitions.  Or did you think by looking the other way Iran would suddenly decide that Israel has the right to exist.  Or that Kim Jong-un wears military fatigues because he’s fashionable. 
John Minehan Added Jan 7, 2018 - 10:30am
target="_blank">https://www.axios.com/the-wolff-lines-on-trump-that-ring-unambiguously-true-2522675021.html
 
"[T]he president's views of foreign policy and the world at large were among [his White House's] most random, uninformed, and seemingly capricious aspects. His advisers didn't know whether he was an isolationist or a militarist, or whether he could distinguish between the two."
 
---I'll take a guess: Trump sees a need to re-trench to carve a smaller niche for the US, which will require building a decent military force to hold on to that niche while we have the resources.
 
"In the Trump White House, policy making ... flowed up. It was a process of suggesting, in throw-it-against-the-wall style, what the president might want, and hoping he might then think that he had thought of this himself."
 
---I have seen this in the Army, in hospitals & physician practices and in law firms.  It is more common than anyone wants to admit.
 
"If a wackadoo moment occurred on the occasions … when his remarks careened in no clear direction, his staff had to go into intense method-acting response. It took absolute discipline not to acknowledge what everyone could see."
 
---I still remember the day in 1990 when a then-COL(P) kept demanding of the 1st CAV FOD, a major just out of Leavenworth, with increasing belligerence, if he "did the do-do-do."  It took some time for someone to realize the Chief of Staff was asking if the FOD had checked if the motor pool gates were locked.  A lot of the people who are in charge (and who are slated for even more important positions of responsibility) are not only a bit eccentric, they are also belligerent and somewhat anti-social.
 
 "[H]e trusted his own expertise — no matter how paltry or irrelevant — more than anyone else's. What's more, he had an extremely short attention span, even when he thought you were worthy of attention."
 
---I never met a Flag Officer this was not true of.  With some (Wes Clark comes to mind), they were right to trust their own instincts.  With others,  it was disastrous.  Really good CEOs in Healthcare filter everything through their own lens, almost always a clinical one. 
 
---The problem with this Trump is that, as a business man in a close corporation (and one generally acknowledged to be a cult of personality), he has never had to fake getting along with the other sociopaths, as you have to in politics.  
Michael B. Added Jan 7, 2018 - 11:03am
"In the Trump White House, policy making ... flowed up. It was a process of suggesting, in throw-it-against-the-wall style, what the president might want, and hoping he might then think that he had thought of this himself."
 
I forgot which movie and director was being referred to, but some actor said something to the effect of, "He didn't know what he wanted until the moment he saw it. It was pure hell, and he drove everyone nuts." I've had several bosses like that.
John Minehan Added Jan 7, 2018 - 11:51am
"I've had several bosses like that."
 
In a way, it is becoming a kind of norm.  You have to consciously avoid doing it in a way . . . . 
John Minehan Added Jan 7, 2018 - 12:36pm
Well, the Border Issues on the Amur River between the PRC and the USSR in '69 and '70 were a bigger issue since the PRC had the Bomb.
Michael B. Added Jan 7, 2018 - 1:38pm
Supposedly, the Iranians were scaling down their nuclear program, or at least not expanding it, until Iraq was invaded. Since then, it's been on afterburner.
Tubularsock Added Jan 7, 2018 - 1:39pm
Chris, excellent analysis. If the U.S. would stop attacking everybody we may find some common ground. But as long as we keep up this drive for world domination it will play out the same way.
 
What amazes Tubularsock is that the U.S. can have billions of dollars of trade contracts with all these so called "enemy" nations but can't get to a peace agreement with any of them.
 
Maybe keeping the American public in fear all the time is an advantage to the thieves running the government.  
 
 
opher goodwin Added Jan 7, 2018 - 3:38pm
Ha ha - that was hilarious. Well done - and very well done for 2016!!
I think it is totally unbelievable that for the first time in history we have mainstream news in Britain talking about the sanity and competence of a US President. They didn't even do that with Bush. It demonstrates to me that the people at the top are concerned about the stability and capricious unpredictability of the guy. He's a menace. The sheer way in which a reporter like that was given such access shows the level of chaos going on.
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 7, 2018 - 9:17pm
John - your comment:
The problem with this Trump is that, as a business man in a close corporation (and one generally acknowledged to be a cult of personality), he has never had to fake getting along with the other sociopaths, as you have to in politics.  
 
rings very true with me. Donald Trump has never had to be accountable to anyone other than himself. As such, his organization has evolved to meet his needs, wants, and desires, and to use flattery and sycophancy in order to stay in Donald's favor. For me he was a very poor example of a businessman to extol his experience in this arena as a reason for his election. A much better example would have been someone who built his company from the ground up, took the company public, and then at some point decided that other goals were worth his time. Give me an Elon Musk well before I'd ever want another Donald Trump.
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 7, 2018 - 9:24pm
Chris and Thomas - the ins and outs of nuclear strategy has always been the subject of game theory experts. The problem with that theory is that it assumes the participants are rational. When one or both of the opponents is not rational, then the rules of game theory can be thrown out the window. Chris, I agree with your assessment with one caveat - what do you think would happen if a false flag operation were to occur and our President were in one of his existential crisis moments and chose to overreact?
 
I'm not one for the majority of conspiracy theories, but I do acknowledge that there are many in what has been described as the deep state who have motivations that may differ wildly from official policy. As such, they may have no compunction for fomenting conflict by creating a fake incident.
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 7, 2018 - 9:25pm
Opher, thanks. Only my friends saw and heard my version of this tune before the election. Wish I could have gotten it in the public domain in real time.
Dave Volek Added Jan 8, 2018 - 3:46am
It seems strange that a book about the dysfunction of the White House, which we already knew about, becomes an instant best seller, whereas a book about an alternative form of governance, which could prevent a lot of this dysfunction goes nowhere.
opher goodwin Added Jan 8, 2018 - 6:02am
Dave - maybe you're not being sensational enough?
Dave Volek Added Jan 8, 2018 - 10:23am
Opher
 
From where I sit, it is indeed a big paradox. If we don't want politicians like Mr. Trump or Ms. Clinton, we should be looking at alternative systems of governance.
 
Deep down inside, I think we like the drama. Mr. Trump has provided a lot of drama in the last two years.
 
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 8, 2018 - 10:57am
Chris - I was being somewhat facetious when referring to the Deep State. Still, there are factions in each government that has their own agendas and sometimes will execute actions contrary to stated government policy. That is where the issues may come from now, a third party may wish to institute a fake or false issue in order to draw other parties into conflict.
Even A Broken Clock Added Jan 8, 2018 - 10:59am
Dave, I think you are correct about being addicted to the drama. That's the only reason I can think of for Trump's election. There were enough people who bought into the fictional role on the apprentice to believe that Donald Trump was not the Oakland* of politicians.
 
* Gertrude Stein's famous definition of Oakland - there's no there there.
opher goodwin Added Jan 8, 2018 - 12:40pm
Dave - Trump has certainly become entertainment. The frightening thing is that he has got a big big button on his desk.
Dave Volek Added Jan 8, 2018 - 5:42pm
Evan
I think Trump supporters like the drama. And many of them believe he can fix things.
 
And I think many from the political left like the drama too.
 
 
CC
I doubt I will develop the fiction writing skills to tell a kiss-kiss-bang-bang story around the TDG. I envision a fully functioning TDG will be rather boring--and citizens will need other means to develop whatever level of angst they feel they need to to develop in their lives. Or perhaps better said, society will have much fewer anxiety attacks as governments are more apt to address issues before they get critical and address them with a more competent approach. 
 
Opher
 
I visited the ICBM facility in Great Falls, Montana. According the Air Force guide, the protocols are much more complicated than Hollywood makes them out to be.
 
I would like to be a fly-on-the-wall in those meetings of the protocols to push that button. There maybe an official protocol to launch a nuclear strike; but there just might be an unofficial protocol run by cooler heads. 
 
 
George N Romey Added Jan 8, 2018 - 6:53pm
What people really want is someone to give simple but unworkable answers to complex issues. That’s what Trump did.
Jeffry Gilbert Added Jan 8, 2018 - 10:30pm
These fuckers would sell their degenerate mothers for their fucked up egos!
 
Obummer, Orangefuck and the rest of them.

 
I couldn't have said it better myself.