Presidential Pottymouths

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We've all heard the rhetoric, the speeches, the pledges, the promises, and everything else that flows like a broken sewer line from a typical politician's scummy and septic mouth. We all know they're somewhere between pond scum and slime molds the size of entire counties, but what about their private conversations?

 

Trump is being raked over a bed of dung-fired coals over his "shithole" comment. That's the ONE thing I like about Trump, is that there's probably not a huge difference between his public and private utterances. Others, however, faked the funk very well. Anyway, here's a few snippets from some of my favorite ones, Democrat and Republican:

 

Lyndon Baines Johnson (D)

 

If the circumstances make it such that you can't fuck a man in the ass, then just peckerslap him. Better to let him know who's in charge than to let him get the keys to the car.

 

Ford's economics are the worst thing that's happened to this country since pantyhose ruined finger-fucking.

 

Fuck your parliament and your constitution. America is an elephant. Cyprus is a flea. Greece is a flea. If these two fleas continue itching the elephant, they may just get whacked good ...We pay a lot of good American dollars to the Greeks, Mr. Ambassador. If your Prime Minister gives me talk about democracy, parliament and constitution, he, his parliament and his constitution may not last long...

 

We have just lost the South for a generation. (After signing the 1964 Civil Rights Act)

 

Those stupid fucking sailors were shooting at a bunch of flying fish. (Referring to the Gulf of Tonkin incident)

 

A God-damned, third-rate, piss-ant country. (Referring to North Vietnam)

 

In addition to his other intimidating qualities, President Johnson allegedly had a Johnson that rivaled Milton Berle's, which he would wave around and show to willing and unwilling Presidential pecker checkers.

 

Richard Milhous Nixon (R)

 

You know, it's a funny thing, every one of the bastards that are out for legalizing marijuana are Jewish. What the Christ is the matter with the Jews, Bob? What is the matter with them? I suppose it is because most of them are psychiatrists.

 

The Jews are irreligious, atheistic, immoral bunch of bastards.

 

I have the greatest affection for them [Negroes] but I know they're not going to make it for 500 years. They aren't. You know it, too. The Mexicans are a different cup of tea. They have a heritage. At the present time they steal, they're dishonest, but they do have some concept of family life. They don't live like a bunch of dogs, which the Negroes do live like.

 

There are times when an abortion is necessary. I know that. When you have a black and a white. Or a rape.

 

I'm not for women, frankly, in any job. I don't want any of them around. Thank God we don't have any in the Cabinet.

 

Despite his Quaker upbringing, The Nix didn't see God's other children the way he probably should have; the Watergate Tapes literally speak for themselves, with Tricky Dick using a vocabulary that easily could have inspired David Duke and Andrew Dice Clay.

 

So...is there anything new under the Sun? Really?

Comments

Jeffry Gilbert Added Jan 17, 2018 - 1:54am
So...is there anything new under the Sun? Really?
 
 
Indeed there is Michael, its called identity politics. Its buggered the entire world. 
 
"....why is the liberal/progressive/left comfortable with being aligned with the warmonger neoconservatives and the military/security complex against President Donald Trump who intended, until he was blocked, to reduce the extremely dangerous to all of mankind tensions between the US and Russia created over 24 years by the Clinton, George W. Bush, and Obama regimes? If you are really against violence, why oppose the only president we have had since Reagan who wants to reduce the risk of nuclear conflict?.....What explains the total unreality in which Americans exist? We are supposed to be the leaders of the world. How can we lead when we are so utterly, hopelessly blind and stupid and consumed by hate?" - Paul Craig Roberts
 
Flying Junior Added Jan 17, 2018 - 3:00am
I don't care if Trump is the most disgusting, politically incorrect, sexist, hypocritical, negro-hating son-of-a bitch that ever came down the pike.  He can say bad words all day...
 
It's dangerous to have a man of his politics and character as  our president.  All of this pearl-clutching about his latest utterances is weak and ineffective.  We should be working together to rid ourselves of this demon.
 
That's been the whole problem since day one.  Every time the guy sneezes out another disgrace, somehow it's news.  The guy is a media whore.  He played his way to the top by playing idiots that couldn't help but publicize his latest turdie.
 
Thanks alot NPR, CNN, MSNBC and the rest of you fucking pukes that followed this guy around like he was royalty.
 
Fuck you.  I blame you.
wsucram15 Added Jan 17, 2018 - 8:44am
But these people dont act like this publicly. I know he said this in a closed Congressional meeting...but he has repeatedly said things like this in public although not as ruthlessly blatant.
You  know..all Presidents are liars or crooks to get things done ppl might not agree with, whatever.  No one disputes that...they would not be in Washington, DC in the top cop position if they weren't.  However, what Trump does is not for you..its for him.  He has always been that way.  There have been others like him..just not as open or widespread.
I also agree with FJ..its the media which jesus..repeats on the hour (every hour) every fart this guy has, sometimes from different vantage points and with varying descriptions.  Its disgusting and he does things on purpose and they know it.  People are stupid or stuck in hotels and tune in..and the stations collect ratings. their sponsors collect money. MSNBC and CNN are by far the worst. 
Seriously..the White House has a press conference every day to defend any actions or statements made by the President.  Which is a futile effort because the stations attack everything that is said.  I just like Sanders..shes so sarcastic with the press. 
Autumn Cote Added Jan 17, 2018 - 9:10am
Please note, authors that are responsive to commenters are usually rewarded by more comments and qualify to have their articles featured in my once a week email blast.   
Dino Manalis Added Jan 17, 2018 - 9:31am
A president should always act presidential and respectful!
Thomas Sutrina Added Jan 17, 2018 - 5:53pm
The media should be attacking Senator Dick Durbin for leaking what was a private meeting.  And what happens in these private meeting are legally confidential.  So Dick Durbin may have broke the law.
George N Romey Added Jan 17, 2018 - 7:30pm
It’s got you media. The MSM made a fortune off of making Trump and now they’ll make a fortune off of taking Trump down. He was ratings fodder from the day he announced his running.
Thomas Sutrina Added Jan 17, 2018 - 7:53pm
Actually MSM will end up with a nich viewership.
Jeffry Gilbert Added Jan 18, 2018 - 5:21am
I for goddamn one give zero fucks what any of the lying goddamn pottymouth goddamn fuckin' mutherfuckers say I only goddamn fuckin' give a goddamn fuck that they take a flying fuck to fuckin' Jupiter and leave us the goddamn fuck alone. 
 
That's just fuckin' me, I could be fuckin' wrong. 
Leroy Added Jan 18, 2018 - 6:54am
I'm glad no one is around to recording my every utterance.  I might make LBJ blush.
 
Wait a minute.  Alexa, are you recording me?  Oh, crap!
wsucram15 Added Jan 18, 2018 - 8:28am
Jeffry..lol
Jeffrey Kelly Added Jan 18, 2018 - 8:07pm
Never knew LBJ had such a way with words........
 
So, Trump is a crass person.  Not a newsflash.  Lots of presidents have loose lips.
 
I’m less concerned about what Thud says than what he does.  
John Minehan Added Jan 18, 2018 - 8:15pm
"My mother, who was a real lady and an impeccable judge of character . . . and who grew up in Northeastern, Democratic Machine Politics . . . used to quote LBJ as to political expedience, "I'd rather have him inside the tent p!$$ing out than outside the tent p!$$ing in."
 
She usually said it in the form of "Always remember what Lyndon Johnson said about the tent."
 
She (and, by extension, LBJ by what of Bob Caro) was right.  
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:06pm
@ Captain Gilbert - Some cocksucking fucking ass-fucked fuck called me a fucking pottymouth! What the fuckin' fuck. Those fucking cock-sucking fuckers can suck the shit out of my ass. Pottymouth!?! LOL
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:06pm
@ FJ - Yes, they're getting a lot of overtime, and will for quite a while longer, lol.
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:06pm
@ Jeanne - I can only imagine what his State of the Union speech would be like, lol.
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:07pm
@ Autumn - Sorry dear, but I'm all strung out at work these days!
 
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:07pm
@ Dino - I give the usual answer to your comments: No shit, Sherlock! lol
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:07pm
@ Thomas S. - I have no idea what the exact rules are governing such gatherings are, but I would guess that's it's both explicit and implicit that it's not for public consumption.
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:07pm
@ Leroy - Once at work, when digital cameras were still fairly new, I was trying to take pictures but it wasn't. I let loose the usual and expected stream of expletives before finally figuring it out. Right when I took the needed photos, my boss came up and said he needed it immediately. The next day he played the video with my NC-17 rated tirade, which was being recorded without me knowing it the whole time, lol.
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:07pm
@ JK - True, true, that.
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 9:08pm
@ John M. - That was the quintessential LBJ statement, lol!
John Minehan Added Jan 18, 2018 - 10:23pm
"@ Captain Gilbert - Some cocksucking fucking ass-fucked fuck called me a fucking pottymouth! What the fuckin' fuck. Those fucking cock-sucking fuckers can suck the shit out of my ass. Pottymouth!?! LOL"
 
Now, we know what Negan did before the Apocalypse . . . . 
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 10:35pm
John, I have no idea who Negan is, but whoever he is, I like him already, lol. Once I had a Russian tell me, "Michael, for the longest time, I thought that the Russian language was the richest in profanity and vulgarity, but after being around you, I've decided it is English." I took that as a high compliment; it was like Gary Kasparov saying I was a better chess player, or Boris Yeltsin saying I could drink him under the table. LOL
Michael B. Added Jan 18, 2018 - 10:39pm
Another time, someone told me that I was intimidating. My reply:
 
"INTIMIDATING!!! WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU CALLING INTIMIDATING!!!! I AM NOT INTIMIDATING!!!! I'M A NICE FUCKING GUY! DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME!?! I HEAR THIS SHIT ONE MORE FUCKING TIME, I'M GOING TO DROP-KICK YOUR SORRY FUCKING ASS INTO ANOTHER ZIP CODE!!! DON'T FUCKING CALL ME "INTIMIDATING" EVER A-FUCKING-GAIN!!!!
Flying Junior Added Jan 19, 2018 - 2:55am
All you crazy-ass bitches are fucking nuts!
Mircea Negres Added Jan 19, 2018 - 3:34am
Whenever people try to portray themselves as good in public, I ask myself what evil or unpalatable fact about themselves they conceal. Therefore, I neither take seriously politicians and "celebrities", nor try to appear as something I am not. Come to think of it, I have a foulmouthed ringtone for my phone, in which an American drill sergeant lets me know "Hey cocksucker, there's a call for you, a stupid motherfucker's tryin' to get through..." Time to put it back on, I reckon.
Michael B. Added Jan 19, 2018 - 9:09am
"Whenever people try to portray themselves as good in public, I ask myself what evil or unpalatable fact about themselves they conceal."
 
LOL! Yes, there are many instances where they are portrayed as smiling, happy-go-luck, warm-hearted people, but in reality, they're a bunch of cold, savage, vicious, treacherous cocksuckers. Don't ever underestimate what a good publicist can do, lol.
Stone-Eater Added Jan 19, 2018 - 10:15am
Cool one.
 
Only shows that artificial envelope of politicians, be it in the US or elsewhere. But in fact:
 
Is there anybody out there ((c) Pink Floyd) who actually believes all that official blather ? I mean, 0.5 % content and 99.5 % meaningless fillers.
 
I mean in fact they are in private the same as we are. They're ACTORS. So what does one expect ???
Stone-Eater Added Jan 19, 2018 - 10:21am
BTW:
 
Sind doch eh alles komplett verblödete Arschlöcher und Scheisskriecher, die Politiker. Die lassen sich von jedem Arsch ficken, der sie bezahlt. Drecksluder sind die Scheissweiber, die sich mit Schnellficks in die Karriere befördern lassen, und die alten geilen impotenten Glatzköpfe mit Kohle aber Hirn lecken noch so gerne jedes Loch, das ihnen entgegengestreckt wird !
 
I can write that. No censorship in German yet LOL
Stone-Eater Added Jan 19, 2018 - 10:25am
BTW: It's some kind of a German translation of Jeffry's post. But we don't have a fuck in German, so we need more variety.
opher goodwin Added Jan 19, 2018 - 1:45pm
Trump is can obnoxious man, a racist and a self-serving liar but the thing that is most wrong with the man is his policies - he puts his racism into practice and his selfish money-grabbing into law. It's a series of stupidities that will be paid for in deaths and destruction. Deregulation is all about putting money in the pockets of the rich at the expense of people's safety and the environment. It is a cost that we will come to rue.
Donna Added Jan 19, 2018 - 2:31pm
FJ. Best comment on this article.. At best he strives for attention and the media and his punks of Wash. Just give it to him. Pathetic. Excuse of a Pres. 
Bill H. Added Jan 19, 2018 - 11:10pm
 
Sorry, x
But Lyndon Johnson's alleged remarks are no excuse for any President's bigotry in this day and age.
John Minehan Added Jan 20, 2018 - 8:38am
Negan is a Walking Dead reference.
 
After serving with the US Army in East Africa, where the big political fact was the existence of a failed state, I have become very interested in historical accounts and fictional depictions of how states and societies fall apart.
Stone-Eater Added Jan 20, 2018 - 9:21am
Jeffry
 
why is the liberal/progressive/left comfortable with being aligned with the warmonger neoconservatives and the military/security complex against President Donald Trump who intended, until he was blocked, to reduce the extremely dangerous to all of mankind tensions between the US and Russia created over 24 years by the Clinton, George W. Bush, and Obama regimes?
 
Missed that one. True. But why ? Because arms sales are cash. Maybe Paul Craig Roberts should have asked the question too why Trump, who wanted to have good relations with Russia and ease tensions, has made that billion deal with the Saudis....I mean who commanded him to do that ? It doesn't fit.
Stone-Eater Added Jan 20, 2018 - 9:23am
BTW: Trump should have known that making the Saudi deal would create tensions with Iran which is an ally of Russia. Hmmmm......maybe behind the curtain there's another agenda ;-)
Michael B. Added Jan 20, 2018 - 10:09am
John M., someone I know is into that show and is always cajoling me to watch it. I think that's one thing that failed states have in common - they're shitholes. I'm sure you've seen some doosies in your travels and assignments.
Utpal Patel Added Jan 21, 2018 - 4:08am
Highlighting two presidents from 40 years ago that behaved worse than Trump, is not an excuse for Trump’s politically incorrect behavior today.  After all, I noticed you didn’t provide anything on Obama, Bush, Clinton, Reagan and Carter.  That’s quite a spell of presidents behaving like presidents.
John Minehan Added Jan 21, 2018 - 6:29am
"Clinton and "behaving like a . .  . [a president]" is quite a stretch, post 1998 . . . .
Michael B. Added Jan 21, 2018 - 10:39am
@ John M. - That reminds me of a line from Mr. Deeds Goes to Town, who in turn was quoting Thoreau:
 
"They created a lot of grand palaces here, but they forgot to create the noblemen to put in them."