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I just saw this on LinkedIn, and I thought: This is about how we see the average American, our impression when we talk to him. Kind of a mixture between a grown Disney child whose father has lived in the McCarthy era and hates therefore everything that dares to intervene in what he calls "freedom", pay taxes to feed the "lazy", legalize marijuana so the weak minds can get onto their clouds, and pay health measures, I mean, it's not my fault when the guy next door loses his job and grieves until he falls sick and needs help. Weak bastards, them, right (says John Doe while eating potato chips and doing sports watching TV) ? Americans think they are best until it hurts, no, not them, but others. Puts food in his belly until he can't get out of bed and needs to be hauled off through the window. Watches American football because the brawl in the local bar finished too early.  Mixes up Hollywood and CNN, well, all same, is it ? Paris is in Texas and in Switzerland people don't talk, they yodel. 

OK OK. Slap me, bash me, whack me until I stick to the ceiling for that :-) Call me anti-American. Well I am, when it comes to Ronald ReagDonald, Jay-any letter, Kilometry Cirrus, Bitchary Clinton and Kissinger, Rumsfeld and Rove, and Billy Graham. 

But I'm also anti-European, when it comes to Ferkel Merkel, Queenie Liz the not-amused, Silvio Berlusconi (but he's got taste for women, though), François Netherland, or my favorite asshole Porochenko. Fish'n'chips is NOT healthy, and Haggis is no food but something which keeps you from dying of hunger. British hooligans have as many brain cells as one of my intestine worms, German Nazis are too dumb to make a decent selfie, and the Poles can't move a yard without hailing any Pope who serves at the Vatican Bank. 

And I'm also anti-African because these burned, muscle-swinging peckerheroes don't even know how to use a can-opener because they can't figure the direction on how to turn the darn thing. They don't compose music because they can't memorize more than 4 tunes in a row, that's why they merely improvise. They have so many languages because they can't learn a proper one so they just babble what comes into their heads, and that's enough for the closest environment, moving further is not possible walking in a circle. 

And I'm anti-Chinese. These guys sleep all day, can't open their eyes, that's why they follow blindly any work or life philosophy on the millions, they even marry in groups of thousands because together it's easier than alone when fearing to get lost. They eat anything because they can't see what they eat anyway, so who cares, in it goes, from brain to toe nail, main thing is hinghonghung. 

I'm glad I have no prejudices. I do like, besides myself, me and I. That's 3 people, noone can say I'm self-centered. 

And if you take this seriously, you might even have less brain cells than me, because I have millions, but the most are used to feed my anti-feeling :-)



Patrick Writes Added Jun 9, 2015 - 9:12pm
How did Billy Graham make it onto the list of Americans you hate?
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 10, 2015 - 2:38am
I see that MD does not understand irony SEF.   Is that another stereotype.
May I say, as one xenophobe to another, that this is an excellent article.
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 4:44am
Hi guys thanks for all the replies, and  special welcome back to Buggie and also to Marilyn..:-)
As I wrote, the ones who took this seriously probably read only the top paragraph:
And if you take this seriously, you might even have less brain cells than me
...do we know who's got humour and who doesn't, right Robin ;-)
Thanks, Robin, even more since it comes from you as being not only a musician but also a reflected person, no babbling here.
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 4:47am
Billy Graham just popped up as he's a deluder in my view...mind you I wrote that quite quickly and, as I said, not too be taken too seriously, as Robin said this is irony, although .... as you might know, a grain of truth is in every joke ;-)
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 4:51am
Hats ?
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 4:53am
Well...frankly, I didn't want to write something political, in fact, because I hoped I might entertain some of our rather restricted minds instead of giving them a chance to rant - but apparently I was WRONG, as Tony would say LOL
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 10, 2015 - 7:22am
MD thinks irony is like goldy... but not quite as good
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 10:19am
I used to wear a cap, but then I noticed .... ;-)
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 10:33am
Irony is the little brother of sarcasm and cynism is the head of the family LOL
Johnny Fever Added Jun 10, 2015 - 1:14pm
Some of you might not grasp the meaning of this article, might be that you have to free some of your brain cells for new reflections
In other words, if I don’t agree with you it’s because I’m not using all my brain cells?  What is it about the left and their inability to appreciate that other people may not see the world as they see it?  For example, I saw your map and laughed because it’s funny.  Only someone who despises Americans would think the map is a truthful representation of us. 
To be sure, we often laugh because its true but mature people with brain cells know that stereotypes are just that…stereotypes.  In other words, many Canadians love hockey and many Indians work in tech support.   Thanks for the laugh.  
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 1:17pm
Glad you like it - you might have noticed that I in fact hate almost everybody, but there's not enough Chinese here to rant about :-)
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 10, 2015 - 1:59pm
Who is this bloke the "left" that Johnny keeps talking about?   Is it an affectionate nick name for you Stoney?
It is a self evident fact that people from different backgrounds and different circumstances see things differently.
For example I can quite understand that someone with loads of cash, and no sense of community, would not like the idea of a National Health Service.   But it is quite obvious why someone who is poor might like the idea.
Someone who watches Fox News will have a much different view from someone who reads the Guardian.  This is obvious.   They will each be fed different items with different slants... of course their ideas will differ.
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 2:45pm
That's why I'm politically neither left nor right but, as a socio-democrat, in the middle, although I lean to the left.
You live best in the middle. A bottle of Gin a month is better than one a day, a cigarette a day is better than one  in 5 minutes ;-)
Extremes are no good in any subject, state hospitals have to be financed by the ones who have the cash, as has infractructure and health services.
Give and take in PROPORTIONS, but exactly that's lacking, the extreme is take from the poor and give to the rich.
Anybody who doesn't understand such basics is just an idiot. When you always take and never give, the one you take from will one day come back and take YOURS.
mark henry smith Added Jun 10, 2015 - 3:24pm
I don't trust tests anymore. I talk to the smart kids at the library and they answer incorrectly on purpose because they think the tests are stupid. You'd actually have to have a conversation to know what they really know and think. Actually have to communicate. They think the map's funny too. They know a lot more than they're given credit for.
And I don't think anybody really hates anybody else in these political discussions. I don't think there's enough understanding of the other side to have it be hate. It's contempt. Contempt that someone might have the gall to disagree with the crap you believe.
And Stone, I watched some Billy Graham sermons and was much impressed by his oratory. He wove a compelling narrative about the human need for faith in a higher power, to give us the strength to live outside of ourselves and our prejudices. Did Christ die for our sins, or because he threatened an entrenched power structure? Is there a difference? Thanks. From the smartest man in the world with a 97% chance of certainty, and the most humble, one of the five best cooks, Ni To Ichi/Shrengi Kempo master, story-teller extraordinaire, lover of Taylor Swift until he dumped her to go live with his mother in a chair because Taylor was getting too clingy. Marko (-:)>+ roll the r, keep the faith    
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 3:29pm
He wove a compelling narrative about the human need for faith in a higher power
Not everybody needs faith in a higher power, it's up to me alone, and I don't like people missioning on me. The most intolerant people are the ones who think they have the absolute truth, and I count those fundamentals among them.
But that's another subject. We have to place responsability on ourselves, not on a hologram ;-)
mark henry smith Added Jun 10, 2015 - 3:59pm
Stone, I've never met an honest Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, Voodoo, who didn't accept personal responsibility for his/her actions. All this Devil made me do it, or God speaks through me so I'm right, is a perversion to my way of thinking. This, I read the right book so I'm always right, is ignorant at best, and hostile at worst. And by higher power, I think it could be humanity, the collective ability of humanity to make a better world with proper encouragement. We definitely can't do it on our own. Believe me, I've tried.
And in merely wanting things to change, improve, be more equitable, we have to go all missioning. We have to want to provoke interest and change mindsets. For a guy who doesn't like people missioning on you, I think you do a commendable job casually missioning for peace, love, and understanding. Keep at it, whatever higher-power wills you on, or not. Your friend in doubt, Marko (-:)>+    
Rex Added Jun 10, 2015 - 4:46pm
Stone please refrain from being a pessimist. You will make me seem (and sound) up beat.
I understand the criticism. I too, feel that we have let things slide to the point of no return sometimes.
Perhaps it is the American core rearing its optimistic head in me that feels if we can ever get our S**t together we can still fix things.
Unfortunately I seem to be thinking that less and less. Especially with another election season moving in on us. I find presently NO ONE is even worthy of my current voting stance (voting for the person who can do the least harm while in office).
I can say that while I am anti-illegal immigration I feel that Europe and Asia have a much worse class of illegals invading that does the USA.
I know what I would like to see happen every one go back to their home countries and try to get the type of government you want instead of escaping and coming here. When you leave you diminish your country's situation even further. You leave those who have not been able to escape at the mercy of tyrants and exploiters. Where is your patriotism and nationalistic pride that should make your want to fix things not escape from them.
FYI folks your entering the country without the education and ability to work for yourselves creates additional people I have to pay for with my tax money.
Ann Coulter in her most recent book is calling for a decade long moratorium on any immigration the America no exceptions. I like the Idea but the problem is not just the legal immigrants but also the illegals that she does not deal with. Until we stop being compassionate and send them back immediately it will not fix our problem. 
I agree that America for the most part and Americans live in a bubble where they do not worry about whether a mail box will explode when they put a letter in it. No do we in most large cities have to worry about being sprayed with bullets.
It happens here too, but only in the BAD neighborhoods. I thought about that after the bombings in France that we pay little attention to the rest of the world because daily we are not confronted with life or death choices.
I would like to see more integration of world news in to the main stream news programs. It will not happen because it is depressing and even the evening news balances the bad news with feel good stories. 
I believe this is very dangerous to the country because when something really bad and nationwide happens we will not be prepared for it. We will not know how to cope or deal with it.
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 4:59pm
Thanks for your comment, I'm no pessimist, in fact, if I were I wouldn't do my work for Africa, I would just let it go and keep every minute and dollar to myself ;-)
You see, that article is a funny one, and I'm making fun of ALL ignorants, not only Americans, it just happened that the picture inspired me to it, it could well have been another country to start with.
The tone I wrote it mirrors the thoughts of a general ignorant about the world, the stereotypes and prejudices. I mean most here on WB don't fit in, and it's good like that.
Basicall we all, wherever we are, have to wake up before it's too late.
Stone-Eater Added Jun 10, 2015 - 5:01pm
For a guy who doesn't like people missioning on you, I think you do a commendable job casually missioning for peace, love, and understanding
I mission for "universal values", or "general human values", as they should be, and not for some old bugger in the stratosphere LOL :-)
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 11, 2015 - 2:32am
As some day it may happen that a victim must be found,
I've got a little list — I've got a little list
Of society offenders who might well be underground,
And who never would be missed — who never would be missed!
There's the pestilential nuisances who write for autographs —
All people who have flabby hands and irritating laughs —
All children who are up in dates, and floor you with 'em flat —
All persons who in shaking hands, shake hands with you like that —
And all third persons who on spoiling tête-á-têtes insist —
They'd none of 'em be missed — they'd none of 'em be missed!
From the Lord High Executioner...
Stone-Eater Added Jun 11, 2015 - 3:15am
Classy one!
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 11, 2015 - 6:21am
You can't beat a good bit of Gilbert and Sullivan...
Rex Added Jun 11, 2015 - 6:33am
Stone, My husband said I always had difficulty understand the humorous- I guess that still has not changed.
Rex Added Jun 11, 2015 - 6:38am
Marilyn I can always county on you for a negative comment. You really should try for an open mind on things other than the LGBT agenda.
Not a fan of most of the Coulter rhetoric but a moratorium on immigration seems sound given the propellers we are having judging who we are actually letting into the country.
Especially since her book points out that they get almost as much government assistance as do out own homegrown welfare spongers.
The Boston bombers and their parents were legal immigrants and we know how well that turned out.
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 11, 2015 - 7:01am
What must it have been like in the days before the concept of nationalism became that big a deal for the average Joe?   From what I read of history, prior to about the beginning of the 19th century, unless you were of the upper classes and worried about the value of your trade interests, you probably cared little about the nation you belonged to.   From time to time some power or wealth seeking individual would wave a flag and drum up some support for a war, but mostly, we got on with just being people.
Is it time to stop the nationalistic crap?   Stop the "my tribe is better than your tribe" BS?
The world is way to dangerous for this nonsense.  In any event we are ruled by corporations now.
Lem Bray Added Jun 11, 2015 - 11:57am
Wow!  WB is great with the likes of SEF and Marko making fun of JF and MD.  Sorting out the middle.  Terrific.
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 11, 2015 - 12:24pm
Isn't it amazing Tony how it is always the last wave of immigrants that want to haul up the drawbridge after themselves.
My country was based on immigration.  We are all mongrels in England:
My mother was half English and I'm half English too
I'm a great big bundle of culture, tied up in the red white and blue
I'm a fine example of your Essex man
And I'm well familiar with the Hindustan
'Cause my neighbors are half English and I'm half English too

My breakfast was half English and so am I, you know
I had a plate of Marmite soldiers, washed down with a cappuccino
And I have a veggie curry about once a week
The next day I fry it up as bubble and squeak
'Cause my appetites, half English and I'm half English too

Dance with me to this very English melody
From morris dancing to Morrissey
All that stuff came from across the sea

Britannia, she's half English, she speaks Latin at home
St. George was born in the Lebanon, how he got here I don't know
And those three lions on your shirt
They never sprang from England's dirt
Them lions are half English and I'm half English too

Le-li, umma le-li-ya, le-li Umma le-li-ya
Le-li, umma le-li-ya, bledi g'desh akh! le-li-ya

Oh, my country, what a beautiful country you are
Stone-Eater Added Jun 11, 2015 - 2:06pm
Be welcome in our castle :-) We are at your service, sir ! For dinner there's kosher halal meat and peanut salad on watermelon sauce and whipped cream on top.
Stone-Eater Added Jun 11, 2015 - 2:11pm
My country was based on immigration
Mine was not. The first here was Australophitecus, now based in Austria, with the help of some nice ladies became Homo Helveticus, rooted here since march or september 687'788 BC. The historians are not sure yet, they argue about it studying weather charts.
Lem Bray Added Jun 11, 2015 - 5:30pm
Thanks SEF, I'll take the middle loin.
Johnny Fever Added Jun 11, 2015 - 10:33pm
No, it’s a way of categorizing the political leanings of people like yourself and Stone.  You guys think the world would be a better place if we practiced more social justice and I think it would be a better placed if we practiced less of it.  The reason a poor person shouldn’t like the idea of the NHS is because there would be more opportunity for them to rise out of poverty with less government control of the economy.  The NHS sucks a lot of tax dollars away from the economy.  Just think what that money could do if the private individuals still had control over it. 
That's why I'm politically neither left nor right but, as a socio-democrat, in the middle, although I lean to the left.
How can you be neither left nor right and in the same sentence be a socio-Democrat that leans to the left?  You’re obviously of the left…period.  
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 12, 2015 - 2:04am
Whether you think something is left or right depends upon where you stand at any given time.
For example, with Hitler, everyone was a "leftist".   However I think he thought Ghengis Khan was kind of OK for a foreigner.
People need health care so the money needs to be spent somehow.  The NHS clearly works as our life expectancy is around 2-3 years longer than the typical American.   Sounds like a success to me.
It seems that the American private individuals use of the money has not resulted in a happier or longer life for any but the top 1% or so.  That is not the optimum use of resources in an economy now is it.
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 12, 2015 - 2:39am
Left-right is a concept of a one dimensional consciousness.   For us multi dimensional beings it seems like a hopelessly crude and inadequate way of looking at things.
How many dimensions have you got Stoney?
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 12, 2015 - 3:44am
Funny isn't it, that it is only when you start to think more about others that your happiness increases.
Do you think Johnny is an unhappy man Tony?
Stone-Eater Added Jun 12, 2015 - 5:08am
Main dimension is my ears ;)
Stone-Eater Added Jun 12, 2015 - 5:10am
Happiness can be learned, as everything....
Johnny Fever Added Jun 12, 2015 - 8:52am
While the definition of left or right has clearly moved over time, the issues I’m speaking of have been constant.  You subscribe to the side of the political aisle that favors more taxes and more government spending.  And by more taxes I don’t mean higher taxes on the poor and middle class. 
Cuba has socialized healthcare and low life expectancy.   Life expectancy is a silly stat for the measurement of healthcare systems.  As you should know, there are a lot of variables in that statistic, such as the way in which infant mortality is factored in, gun ownership, historical trends, etc.  In other words, life expectancy and healthcare systems are simply uncorrelated. 
Stone & Tony & Robin
I come on this site to do battle with liberals because blowing holes in their arguments makes me happy.  
Lem Bray Added Jun 12, 2015 - 11:52am
Johnny you are wrong on Cuba.  Their life expectancy is longer than the U S.  Check your facts for 2014.
Robin the red breasted songster Added Jun 12, 2015 - 11:59am
Well I am a child of the nth dimension.  Left and right are terms which imply some sort of political affiliation ... of which I have none.  We do things differently here.  JF may well not agree with that... but it suits me and most of my countrymen just fine.
May I wish happiness to you all!
Stone-Eater Added Jun 12, 2015 - 2:03pm
I come on this site to do battle with liberals because blowing holes in their arguments makes me happy
Well, you can't be a very happy man then, Johnny. But keep trying :-)
Stone-Eater Added Jun 12, 2015 - 2:05pm
Right - a smile opens worlds when one is receptive for it and understands humour.
Stone-Eater Added Jun 12, 2015 - 2:07pm
I'm off for the weekend - keep it cool guys :-))
Stone-Eater Added Jun 17, 2015 - 11:16am
Thanks Stephen :-) A joke now and then :-)
Mark Hunter Added May 20, 2017 - 5:23am
Wait, all the Swiss don't yodel? Next you'll be telling me the French don't always surrender and pizza wasn't invented in Chicago.
Mircea Negres Added May 23, 2017 - 3:09am
Stone-Eater, that was damned funny. I love the map too. The thing is, people usually hear (and sometimes read) only what they want. In my case, there was a series called The Unit. The theme song is called Walk the Fire by Robert Duncan, and it started with the words "Give me your secrets, bring me a sign". Maybe the TV speaker was crappy, but I always heard (until eventually coming across the written lyrics) "Give me a reason, bring me a gun". It was very likely a Freudian slip on my part, but I swear that's how I heard the damned lyrics for years! Now just apply this "only what you want to hear" (used to be SA's once-top radio station 5FM's slogan) to seven billion people, and boy, does the world begin to look totally different from what it really is...
Stone-Eater Added May 23, 2017 - 7:50am
Sander de Kool Added Jun 1, 2017 - 1:52am
Don't insult the Dutch by calling Fransois Netherlands SEF ;-)

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